First of all, this is certainly a case of throwing stones in glass houses here, but all Germans make the same mistakes when they speak English. Learning these common mistakes will help you communicate.
First, the most annoying, Germans think Handy means cell phone. Telling them that the word Handy is not English for cell phone will make you endure a horrendous joke about how a Schwäbian guy actually came up the term. Do not tell them its not called a Handy in English under any circumstance, just know that they are talking about a mobile phone and move on.
Beamer is not a BMW, it is a projector.
Eggzill is a spreadsheet program from Microsoft. A warning from first hand experience here is in order. After hearing your German colleagues talk about using Microzoft Vord, Eggzill, and Axis, do not call the other program Microsoft Proyekt, like you think your German colleagues would pronounce it. They will make fun of you for being stupid, if you do.
Actual does not mean actual to a German. To a German actual means current, or up-to-date. For some reason they think aktuell = actual, which gets super annoying, since every German will always make this mistake till they die, no matter how many times you tell them.
Fitness Studio is a gym. Sounds like you’re going to get filmed while you work out, but no worries, it’s just a gym.
Der Smoking is a tuxedo.
Mobbing gives you the image of an angry mob of 50 people ready to kill you, but in German it is any form of harassment or mistreatment, especially in the work place by coworkers or management.
Informations, trainings, etc. Germans make up plural forms of words you can’t really do that with, which sounds pretty ridiculous.
Lucky means happy to Germans. Kind of weird since most Germans use the word happy now and then, as in “This film is a happy end.” By the way Germans, if you are listening, you mean “This movie has a happy ending.”
An Oldtimer to a German means a vintage car, not your grandpa.
A shooting is not what happens on Martin Luther King Jr. Boulevard once a day; Germans use it to mean a photo shoot.
Shrimps is the German word for shrimp, even though they could use their own lanuage, the Germans prefer to misuse ours.
A Body bag in Germany is not what the authorities take dead people to the morgue in, but rather a back pack or a fanny pack.
deutsche Übersetzung für Astrd
Meine liebe Astrid,hier die Übersetzung:
Deutsche sind multilingual
Dies ist sicherlich ein Fall von “Steine im Glashaus werfen”, aber alle Deutschen machen die gleichen Fehler, wenn sie Englisch sprechen. Wenn Sie sich diese häufigen Fehler merken, erleichtern Sie die interkulturelle Kommunikation erheblich.
Der erste und nervigste Fehler ist, dass Deutsche denken, Handy heisst Mobiltelefon. Wenn man Ihnen erzählt, dass das englische Wort für Mobiltelefon nicht Handy ist, fangen sie sofort an, Ihnen einen schrecklichen Witz über einen schwäbischen Mann zu erzählen, der das Wort Handy erfunden hat. Also, tun Sie das, was die Deutschen nicht können und lassen Sie das Korrigieren.
Beamer ist kein BMW, sondern ein Projektor.
Eggzill ist eine Rechensoftware von Microsoft. Auch wenn die deutschen Kollegen immer von Microsoft Vord, Eggzill und Axis reden, sprechen Sie das andere Programm von Microsoft nicht wie Projekt aus, wie Sie vielleicht denken, dass es Ihre deutschen Kollegen tun würden, sonst besteht die Gefahr, dass diese Sie auslachen.
Actual heisst für den Deutschen nicht actual. Für den Deutschen heisst es aktuell oder zur Zeit. Aus irgendeinem Grund denken sie, dass aktuell=actual heisst, was sehr sehr nervig werden kann, weil jeder Deutsche diesen Fehler macht, bis er eingegraben wird, egal, wie oft Sie ihn darauf aufmerksam machen.
Fitness Studio ist ein Ort, an dem man Sport treibt. Es hört sich zwar an, als würde man dabei gefilmt werden, während man dies tut, aber keine Angst, es ist wirklich nur eine Turnhalle.
Der Smoking ist ein sehr formeller Anzug.
Mobbing impliziert das Bild einer wütenden Meute von mindestens 50 Leuten, die einen umbringen wollen, aber auf deutsch steht es für jede Art von Bedrohung oder Misshandlung, besonders bei der Arbeit durch Kollegen oder Mitarbeiter der Führungsebene.
Informations, Trainings, etc. Deutsche erfinden Pluralformen von Wörtern, die eigentlich keine Pluralform haben. Das hört sich ziemlich lächerlich an.
Lucky heisst glücklich für Deutsche. Was etwas merkwürdig ist, da die meisten Deutschen das Wort happy schon gelegentlich verwenden, wie in…dieser Film hat ein happy end. Übrigens, Deutsche, wenn Sie zuhören: Sie sollten eigentlich sagen…dieser Film hat ein happy ending.
Ein Oldtimer hat für den Deutschen die Bedeutung eines alten klassischen Autos und heisst nicht Großvater.
Ein Shooting ist nicht das, was Konny Reimann den unerlaubten Besuchern auf seinem Grundstück in Texas antut, sondern ein Fototermin.
Ein body bag ist kein Leichensack, sondern ein Rucksack oder Ähnliches.
Streichel den Joschy von mir,
John
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April 29th, 2008 at 3:23 pm
Not sure if this is a German thing, but all of my students in Austria don’t understand the difference between “fun” and “funny”. So I get to hear about how “It’s going to be so funny when we have summer holidays.”
May 5th, 2008 at 2:23 pm
excellent blog but I think you’ve missed a few:
A floor is not what you’re walking on, it’s a hall way (floor = Flur)
One I ran into recently myself: irritating means confusing (irritating = irritierend)
Not as common as the other but ver annoying: who might mean where and where might mean who (who = wo, wer = where)
here are probably many more
May 5th, 2008 at 3:14 pm
One of the most annoying things is actually already knowing the meaning of these terms when they come into use by the German public…
I still get confused when someone wants to “shoot” somebody.
Even worse are people who think making up half of their sentences in bad English would make anything they say cool or important. Do you know this kind of manager or wannabe expert who keeps on telling you about flowcharts and stuff and uses the wrong terms all the time?
May 5th, 2008 at 3:22 pm
Yeah Crescent, the absolute most annoying to me is when Germans are speaking in German and then say a word in English, then pause to say, “also … auf Deutsch”, then continue on with the sentence after translating the word into German for the “dumb masses”. This happens a lot on TV or by wannabe managers who are trying to make themselves look superior as experts in some subject.
The vast majority of Germans don’t do it, unless they are trying to convince you they are experts or are trying to sell you some product.
But when they do it makes me want to kick them in the shin.
May 5th, 2008 at 5:36 pm
I think those things happen because most of international business communication is in English, so people are forced to speak a language that most haven’t learned to that extent. Obviously Americans do that, too: just to mention the leitmotif (which is written Leitmotiv in German).
and: nothing for ungood
Those things happen
May 5th, 2008 at 7:09 pm
You are me perhaps one.
May 7th, 2008 at 10:00 am
Anatlo Stefanowitsch of Bremer Sprachblog has an interesting entry on mobbing.
May 7th, 2008 at 10:10 am
I suppose Americans also take [i]body lotion[/i] for something rather creepy, then, or do they actually have the ability to distinguish between a body and a dead body?
May 7th, 2008 at 11:11 am
Nope, body lotion is fine. Body bag is kind of a special case, I guess.
May 9th, 2008 at 12:09 pm
It’s odd to me (for me? Well, my English is considered excellent in the eastern parts of Germany only…) that until today so many peope do not know that Handy is not the English word for cell phone. It’s always taken as example for english-sounding words that are used exclusively in Germany. Why is ist so difficult for them to remember that?
May 12th, 2008 at 2:54 pm
There are some reasons why cellphones are called handies here (http://www.u32.de/handy.html). It’s all about marketing. The american term cellphone couldn’t be used because of the association with the german word for phone booth (Telefonzelle), while the englisch word mobile or mobile phone wasn’t used, because germans associate everything mobile with cars, and carphones where already in use when the first cell-phones came around.
The term was first used by Motorola back in the forties, when thy called their new generation of smaller walkie-talkies simply handie-talkies.
May 17th, 2008 at 11:03 am
I’m sorry, but you are listing things that have nothing to do with “Germans think they speak better English than they do”. Words like “shooting” or “mobbing” are words we use in our common German language, but i would never use it in an English sentence. Hm, I know nobody who says Microzoft Vord, Eggzill, and Axis, but some older people can’t speak English very well, but that’s because they are a completely different generation. Nearly everybody under 30 can pronounce those words correctly.
And one last thing: Yes, in German sentences i say “Handy”, but not in English sentences.
May 18th, 2008 at 12:20 am
Hi,
I think you forgot two words:
eventually = Eventuell (or not)
and the Klassiker: I become a steak (bekommen = to receive)
Andreas
May 18th, 2008 at 6:58 am
Hmmm, well /me thinks you just mix up 2 different things:
- speaking bad english
- english words sipping into german language and becoming genuine part of german
IMHO “handy” is not a ‘wrong english’, but a ‘correct german’ word now, as there are many other of the words you mentioned. you think of these words in english terms, but they already are part of the german language and have changed their meanings more or less. this happens all the time in history (just look at the large amount of words with french origins in the german language).
this process is speeded up by english being the “lingua franca” of today, the language people from many different countries with different english language skills communicate….
a short anecdote:
an english friend of my brother once walked into a “handy” (cellphone) shop in germany. as she was aware of the different word, she asked to buy a “hondy” - she tried to pronouce the word “german”…
the guy at the store corrected her: “This is ‘handy’, not ‘hondy’ - its english, you know…”
May 19th, 2008 at 6:30 pm
Here’s one of my favorites from a meeting:
The (German) leader of the meeting wanted to organize some sort of trade fair. Now, “fair” is “Messe” in German.. if you can’t guess it yourself, she suggested to “make a mess.”
May 22nd, 2008 at 8:36 pm
Here’re two more:
On a worldfair a german reporter states: “This is the biggest mess i’ve ever seen.”
Many germans when telling about their school they say “i went to the gymnasium because my parents wanted me to go to university later”
(gymnasium in germany is the type of school that enables you to visit a university later)
May 25th, 2008 at 7:23 pm
Just one thing, unlike “mobbing”, “handy” etc., “body bag” is by no means a universally accepted word in German. AFAIK it’s a lingual lapse of one or a few companies, much derided in German media.
May 28th, 2008 at 3:19 pm
My personal flavorite is the direct translation (into english) of the German usage of “oder,” as a clue-in to a question.
For example: Would you like to meet for drinks in the center? or?
Perfectly logical sentence auf Deutsch, but akward for a native english speaker. “Or what” would be a typical response.
June 12th, 2008 at 11:56 pm
The problem with the germans is they don’t even speek german. They speek extremely strange and ugly dialects instead. At the same time they like to say “Deutsche Sprache schwere Sprache” to show their intellectual superiority. And yes ! They even think their englisch is better than the englisch of all other people and they want to teach better german and english to persons they have discovered not to be Germans !!!
Sorry for my bad english. My mother language is a german dialect (unfortunately ) close to standard german, closer at least than the ugly dialects spoken by the germans like swabian, palatinian, bavarian… But as I said their favourite sport is to teach me german and english.
June 20th, 2008 at 10:45 am
It’s a bit late (a bit very late…) but: Dent mentioned carphones; In Switzerland we actually have another word for handy / cellphone, which is “Natel”. Originally: “Nationales Autotelefon” - “national carphone”
June 25th, 2008 at 4:33 am
Nice website!!
June 25th, 2008 at 8:10 am
I don’t hear much of this, as I insist Germans stick to German. The Auslaenderin angle covers a multitude of sins - in meetings, I innocently ask what the German term is for every single term they use in English.
For some terms, e.g. corporate governance, there really isn’t an equivalent. One of my pet peeves is “das Feedback” used when they mean “Rueckmeldung” but don’t dare say it, b/c they _really_ mean Kritik.
It does seem that more-educated Germans - HermantheGerman as an example - are far less likely to throw bad English around than are clerks who’ve been in the same small company where they did their apprenticeship after completing the “mittlere-Reife.”
My own English has gotten dodgy, so I can’t be too critical … I mean, I can’t give them too much feedbacks on their English.
June 28th, 2008 at 3:48 pm
was für ein unsinn, kein deutscher denkt, er spreche besser englisch als ein muttersprachlacher. klar, die angliszismen sind schon grausam, falsch und vollkommen unnötig, aber ich denke das legt sich auch wieder. früher wurden französische wörter übernommen, heute englische. das vergeht.
aber was ich hier in den kommentaren viel schlimmer finde ist die tatsache, dass sich über das schlechte englisch der deutschen lustig gemacht wird. kann jemand von euch überhaupt deutsch? vermutlich nicht. und es ist nun mal immer schwierig sich in einer sprache auszudrücken, die nicht muttersprache ist, vor allem, wenn man nicht in dem land, in dem die sprache gesprochen wird, gelebt hat, sondern nur in der schule diese sprache gelernt hat. die meisten bemühen sich wenigstens sich verständigen und einigermaßen gut ausdrücken zu können und dass man ein paar falschen freunden auf den leim geht, passiert in jeder sprache.
nur ein paar gedanken von mir.
June 28th, 2008 at 6:01 pm
@biene: why, if you assume none of us can speak German, do you ask us in German? Is that the famous German sense of irony we hear so much about?
July 18th, 2008 at 9:54 am
Another annoying one. alot of Germans (that I have met) cant pronounce the English “V” which is strange because it is similiar, if not the exact same to the German “W”. My German host sister and alot of my German friends often say Wegetable (for vegetable), wery (for very), etc…
August 2nd, 2008 at 3:27 pm
I have to agree with biene on this. It’s one thing to criticise the Germans for assimilating these english terms so easily and also willingly. That’s a fact I totally dislike being a German myself. But to make fun of them because of their pronounciation is just plain rude.
People who work in big companies who do research or are in management HAVE to use a lot of english terms. Since in these fields english is the way to communicate internationally there is just no use in bothering with a transation which can be quite tricky in some cases. Most of these people don’t have the benefit of having lived in an english speaking country so it’s obviously not that easy to pronounce them perfectly.
Just some thoughts… sorry for my lack of comma placement. It’s one thing my German mind always gets confused about writing english essays.
August 2nd, 2008 at 4:49 pm
>> Another annoying one. alot of Germans (that I have met) cant pronounce the English “V” which is strange because it is similiar, if not the exact same to the German “W”. My German host sister and alot of my German friends often say Wegetable (for vegetable), wery (for very), etc…
That phenomenon is called “overcompensation” or hypercorrection ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hypercorrection ). It’s rather common when learning new languages. It happens when a new sound has to be learned and used.
In this case, Germans are used to pronounce W like the English V. When learning English they’re told how to pronounce the English W. On an almost subconsious level, they often replace the V with the same sound.
However, it’s pretty easy to lose that false behaviour, you just have to notice that you’re doing it wrong.
An annoying example of this V -> W overcompensation can be found in the German dub of Star Trek - The Motion Picture. I hate it when Kirk finds out about V’Ger being Voyager VI and pronounces it Woyager.
August 6th, 2008 at 5:04 am
Biene and Frank, would you seriously stop being so touchy? It’s not like I was never made fun of in Germany when I tried to say Eichhörnchen or Streichholzschächtelchen. We do this in good humor, and Americans do this all the time regardless of the culture. The Germans do it too, and it’s not rude, it’s funny. One of the things that was the most uncomfortable to me in Germany was when I made a funny mistake with pronunciation, laughed, and I got one of the weird people who thought it was rude to laugh, and I felt really awkward. All Americans are like that… seriously. And don’t pretend you don’t laugh at Bruce Darnel.
November 7th, 2008 at 9:05 am
First of all: My English isn’t great, but I try to do my best.
I think, the problem with wrong pronounciation are simply bad teachers.
My friends son is learning English for 3 years, but his teacher does not help him when he pronounces “d” instead of “th”.
Other languages have the same problem: I escaped from a language course “Spanisch”, because the teacher did not intervene, when everybody pronounced the phonems the way he wanted: Adult people should have known after more than two years that the mediterranean island is NOT called “Malorka” or “Machorka”.
November 7th, 2008 at 5:00 pm
Na biene, ich habe oft Deutsche bewundert, die praktisch makelloses Englisch könnten. Sie sprechen gar ohne Akzent und begehen überhaupt keine bemerkbare Fehler. Ein in der Ruhestand getretene Übersetzer, den ich kenne, kann solch schönes britisches Englisch, ich kann ohne zögern sagen, dass er beseres Englisch als ich kann.
Ich andererseits habe deine Muttersprache offensichtlich nicht völlig beherrscht. Du bist befugt meine Sprachfehler zu belächeln. Eigentlich finde ich, dass Verballhornung Spaß machen kann. Ich veräppele meine Freundin ab und zu sogar mit “Leistungswasser” oder “unvorsorglich” anstatt “unverzüglich”. Malapropismus kann ein kreatives Unternehmen sein (kuck mal http://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Malapropismus an für weitere Beispiele).
November 24th, 2008 at 7:41 pm
“[…] even though they could use their own lanuage, the Germans prefer to misuse ours.”
You habe the nail on the head met!
November 24th, 2008 at 7:43 pm
D’OH!!! Typo…
You have the nail on the head met wanted I really say.
December 5th, 2008 at 2:57 pm
and of course a fanny pack may mean one thing to a speaker of American english, but certainly a speaker of British english will be thinking of an entirlely different meaning to the work “fanny” - hint - an more “adult”-rated term for a woman’s private parts!
December 11th, 2008 at 7:55 am
One thing tho’ - “shooting” is actually a correct noun when talking about “Dreharbeiten”, describing the thing that’s done on a movie set. Please refer to http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/shooting number 12… or LEO’s: http://dict.leo.org/ende?lp=ende&lang=de&searchLoc=0&cmpType=relaxed§Hdr=on&spellToler=on&chinese=both&pinyin=diacritic&search=dreharbeiten&relink=on
I just stumbeled upon this, because I do write a great deal about movies and wondered about your blog entry on that particular word. I’ll try to keep on Germlishing the best I can ;0)
December 28th, 2008 at 1:20 pm
I am German and i don´t think that i can speak good English so you are really wrong.
And i thing that everybody that comes from a foreign country has always problems with a new language.
people from the states or Britain sound funny too when they try to speak German.
March 16th, 2009 at 11:24 am
I just noticed this when watching a recent episode of Skins
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Skins_(TV_series)
It may be the “wrong” kind of English, but one of the characters clearly says “shoot me” and hands him his cell phone. (in order to have a picture/video taken)
May 26th, 2009 at 7:31 am
Well, this article is quite nice and there are some real good examples of how Germans mix up things or German companys try to make their products sound “cool” by using english terms.
But you shouldn’t mix up mistakes or the so called “false friends” (like actual - aktuell, eventually - eventuell etc.) with real anglizisms like Oldtimer or Smoking. Like already mentioned in the comments, the english language also comes up with a lot of French, Latin, Spanish or even German words which aren’t always used as originally done. Just look at this amazingly long list in Wikipedia: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_English_words_of_French_origin - I bet a French first language speaker could make fun of all the English speaking people misusing French words as well.
I think the origins of foreign and loan words are quite interesting to analyze as well as how to got into the foreign language. “Smoking” actually comes from “smoking jacket” whereas “Tuxedo” refers to Tuxedo Park, a small club for rich people of New York, where this smaller version of the original dinner jacket was worn at first. So, to claim that “Smoking” as used in German is wrong and stupid isn’t right as well, it rather derivates from the original term much more than the now used English one.
May 26th, 2009 at 7:55 am
Hi everyone,
I know that I am being “touchy” now, but I am really upset. The article would be funny for me if it only made fun of all those “false friends” that happen to have come into life between English and German language because too many germans tried to be hip by using English Words (esp. in Marketing). But for my eyes, it reads with a heavy touch of arrogance. Is it so easy to make fun of people trying to speak your language even if it is sometimes wrong? Most of them try to be polite by not forcing you to have to speak German when dealing with them. I wonder what would happen if all Germans stopped talking English *now*. Big fun. I have seen that the author has put the words “sitting in a glashouse & throwing stones” in the header, but the intonation of the article / blog entry does still hurt me. Especially the easynees in saying “all germans do that”. Right, we are all just a bunch of badly educated, not well speaking idiots - this is how this reaches me. Thanks for that.
How does an American say “Weltschmerz” or “Angst”?. Why not make fun about the differences between british and american english? Fuel / Gas, Lift / Elevator, car booth / trunk.
What is the right English here? The british? The american?
I do fully agree that it is horrible to have to listen to people who try to emit an air of self-importance by using wrong English words. But those are the same people who have no clue about the usage of proper german language or the correct usage of special words like “Paradoxon” or “inspirierend / transpirierend” - always nice to hear “Ich habe heute eine Transpiration gehabt” - *brrrr*.
Germans can make fun of those ambigous usage of English words in German (”Gibts denn hier kein Lift” - making a wordplay out of the identical name for elevator and a soft-drink in Germany… and that in a commercial) because they are willing to learn other languages - these things make me so upset about the impression I personally find left here that (especially ALL!!) Germans are just a bunch of badly educated, humourless idiots who simply love to misuse other lanuguages. I could get engaged and proof how other languages misuse ours (or the Spanish language… or…).
Astrid
PS: Most Germany that *I* know use “Backpack” because Rucksack (which is used now e.g. in Britain) is such an oldfashioned German word. “Body Bag” in my opinion is just an example of how a single someone made an error.
May 26th, 2009 at 10:10 pm
@John: So what is the correct american term for taking professional photographs of someone - since you were o so bothered by the German “shooting”?!
May 26th, 2009 at 10:14 pm
p.s.: Rumanians aren’t that great either - “thank you for nothing”, I was told recently. When I looked at the guy as if just being hit in the face, he explained, that he meant something like “no need to thank me”. Guess I should have said “nothing for ungood”!
May 27th, 2009 at 2:09 am
@Bine, funny story about the Rumanian.
We call it a photo shoot. Just “shooting” by itself here defaults to meaning people shooting guns instead of pictures, probably due to the relative frequency of their occurrences in these parts.
May 28th, 2009 at 5:26 pm
Making fun of Germans speaking English? To be able to graduate German high school, you have to speak a minimum of 2 foreign languages, some even speak 3.
Lets hear your German, smart ass! Oh, sorry, I forgot. Americans don’t speak any foreign languages cause it’s tooo damn hard to learn 16 ways to say “the”.
Wow I’m just glad some people in the past made up the English language or there wouldn’t be way for the “not-so-smart” people in the world to communicate with eachother. So instead of using your one way to say “the” you could go back to point at stuff instead, to make it even easier. lol.
Herman the German
June 9th, 2009 at 12:56 pm
Hmmm…maybe “handy” sounds funny to you guys but look what you have done to words like “Brezel”! Bretzel? Thats weird! At least we don’t spell “handy” like händü or something!
@Astrid:
Ich kenne absolut niemanden (zum glück!) der einen rucksack als “backpack” bezeichnet. Wozu auch? Wir haben das schöne wort “rucksack” dafür und das ist auch gut so. Altmodisch? So’n quark!
June 21st, 2009 at 8:33 pm
Ah, I know the fun and funny thing. One of my German exchange student friends used to always talk about how funny things were here in America. Or the funny thing he did last night that turned out to be not funny at all.. XD
June 26th, 2009 at 1:37 pm
This Blog brought a smile to my face
English is spoken by the English, Scots, Welsh, Irish, Australians, Canadians and South Africans (and by some Cornish).
Americans ‘mangle’ English and then have the cheek to make fun of others who are struggling to learn a foreign language!!!
I say be glad that English has become the Lingua Franca and try to support those who are trying to communicate with a mass of people who are too lazy are too stupid to learn another language.
To quote Homer Simpson: “There’s a NEW Mexico now???”
It’s funny because it says a lot about American culture/attitudes.
Have a nice day (Arrrrgghhhh)
July 8th, 2009 at 11:54 am
…I do wonder why nobody mentioned one of the most confusing aspects of the anglo-germanic language divide: The whole Pepper/Pepperoni/Chili mess!
Pepper (eng) = Chili (ger)
Pepperoni (eng) = (mini)Salami (ger)
Pepperoni (ger) = (Chili) Pepper (eng)
Being German, i guess my english is rather good, since I don’t make any of these mistakes (I did make some of these mistakes in the past (e.g. Beamer), and I *would* have used “mobbing” wrongly if I ever had to use it in a conversation in English I admit!
- And I’ve never ever used “actual” instead of “current”, and honestly even the people I know that are not that versed in English never make that mistake - so much for “every German, until he dies”. Furthermore, I have yet to encounter anyone that uses “lucky” instead of “happy”.
Good English teachers do tell you to watch out for “false friends” like “Oldtimer”, “Happy End” etc. - At least mine did!
And “body bag” is just some hip-sounding made-up term out of a catalogue, not a word that is actually part of the German language!…
November 4th, 2009 at 3:31 am
My objection to the word “handy” is that it is an adjective being used as a noun.
Secondly, no one seems to have mentioned that many Germans use sentences such as, “We have visited Cuba in 1999.” In neither the US nor Great Britain would one use the present perfect for an single action that was completed in the past. I believe native speakers of English would say, “We visited Cuba in 1999.” or “We have visited Cuba many times.” depending on meaning intended.
Suzanne
November 6th, 2009 at 10:58 am
What drives me nuts is when they call it a “Base Cap”
November 30th, 2009 at 8:20 am
Yeah!
I´m german and i know what a “cellphone” is
but i`ve regognized, that i often made the mistake about the plural forms.
(but i can`t guarantee that my currently spelling is right)
November 30th, 2009 at 5:23 pm
When i was watching TV this morning i saw an article about your website in german TV.
Now i look at this site and i think it´s great.
It´s in my list of favourites now because there are so many things to find out.
January 9th, 2010 at 10:42 pm
you forgot to talk about the german word “sunnyboy”, i am sure you heard it:-)
February 15th, 2010 at 7:33 pm
LOL,
OBTW a fanny in American is your bottom, but in British English, a women’s genitals.
I was really shocked the first time in America someone said to me, “she needs a boot up the fanny!!!”.
These cross cultural mistakes happen all the time.
Clavain
February 15th, 2010 at 10:10 pm
Well, I think it is quite true that a lot of Germans - especially younger ones - think that they can converse effortlessly in English - believing that it is the easiest-to-learn and most logical language in the world - while in reality, their pronunciation is horrid, their grammar dodgy and they keep stumbling over false friends without noticing it. When they try to integrate English expressions into their German, not infrequently hilarity ensues, as well …
What’s worse is that quite a lot of German youths do not even seem to be able to speak *either* basic German or English “unfallfrei” (”without accidents”), let alone advanced German or English (which they will probably dismiss as “medieval” or “arrogant-sounding” anyway, at best, consider wrong or even fail to understand). All they can trot out (whether in writing or in talking) is a mix of vulgar German and English or pseudo-English (often Internet) slang, chat talk, SMS shorthands, and expletives - part of the so-called “PISA-Syndrom”.
On http://www.german-bash.org I just found the following:
” Twitter is eine typische Erscheinung der Generation ADS & SMS. Für einen Brief zu faul, für einen kompletten Satz zu dumm und für korrekte Grammatik zu cool.”
DeeKay: It’s even more confusing, as I only relatively recently found out:
Paprika (ger) = Pepper (eng)
To a German, “pepper” is likely only the spice Pfeffer, not a Paprika, Peperoni (spelt with only a single “p”!) or Chili (I was not even aware until relatively recently that Gemüsepaprika - which are not spicy -, the grounded spice called Paprika, Peperoni and Chili are all part of the same species). I keep discovering that my English in practice often sucks, which can be a quite awkward insight.
March 2nd, 2010 at 2:17 am
Your writing is offiensive. Only a racist would insult African Amercans by defining “shooting” as that which “happens on Martin Luther King Jr. Boulevard once a day;” You are very cozy with the stereotype that all African Americans are violence prone.
You are the type of person who expresses hostility masked as humor. I find you very hostile to German people and your observations are mean-spirited and at total variance from my experiences in Germany.
You should not attempt to discourage people from learning German, just because you had a difficult time. If you had respect for language, you would study harder, and I recommend that you start with English.
March 20th, 2010 at 9:00 am
at least they know a little english.easy for u to judge.i bet your german isnt very good:)
June 16th, 2010 at 6:27 pm
I’ve only just discovered your website - but modifications of your statements can certainly be accepted even now?
So please check this:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mobbing
July 9th, 2010 at 7:38 am
Well .. I also just discovered your page. It started out very interesting cause there are many things to learn or to remember like the topics of actual, informationS, etc.
But the further I scroll down the page it becomes sometimes more an more anoying. Some here really over-simplify these topics too much in my opinion. I worked and lived a year in the US and believe me .. the english I sometimes learned and heard there was the same worse style like (I admit) the german young guys sometimes speak here in german when they think the english from MTV and the american rap-stars is “cool”. So there are definately quality differences in every language. But I mostly like ASTRID’s blog entry…. because you have to remember …. like Herman said.. we germans had to start learning english when we were already around 11-12… that’s how it was in my generation (I am mid 30 now) , the younger kids already start now learning english at age of 4-6 .. that for me is amazing and I really like that .. BUT … WE learn and study foreign languages !!!! … and belive me … that is something we in gemany can be proud of … because other countries “sit” on their opinion “The world speaks english” . So a student who has finished all his school and university or whatever education minimum speaks 2 foreign languages in Germany .. so I don’t want to be rude but how is that in the US ?
And never forget … the generation of my parents and grandparents never had a chance in school to learn english . So if you have next time a manager in a meeting in the US ..let’s say in the mid 50’s … never forget that for him it was much harder to learn a foreign language … and everyone here in this blog who is not just 20 knows how difficult it gets more and more to learn something new when you are getting older … right ?
So let us not start blaming each other for gaps we have in language knowledge but just remember that a native language is of course stronger connected to yourself than anything else you have to learn extra…
(Just kidding a bit at the end 
“Nothing for ungood” LOL 
So see this blog as a chance to learn phrases you should remember next time when you need to use them….
Cause if you like to start a ping-pong game “who knows what” we could start to discuss “HISTORY Knowledge outside the US of Americans” , ok ?
August 31st, 2010 at 6:17 am
I’m Australian and I call a BMW a beamer. My favourite German-ism is saying this night instead of last night. It’s a beautiful case of direct translation ‘heute Nacht’. I think these changes in how different people speak a language are fascinating and fun. I know there are bits of my German that are complete crap, though my accent is apparently good (yay!). My Swedish is even worse, I keep getting German caught up in it!
September 29th, 2010 at 1:24 am
Seriously the Germans have ruined their language in the last 60 years as much as it has taken a 1000 years for Norman/French to infect English. Actually, probably even worse… at least English pronounces these words with English pronunciation, plurals and so on. That takes me to another point stop using the English plural, stop using -s!!! It’s not a German plural!!! Seriously, you know that a language is pathetic when the only productive plural is the plural of another language and it own plurals are just a massive list of exceptions. Just because the word is of English origin doesn’t mean you have to use its plural in German, it’s German now use a German plural!!! What’s wrong with adding an -e or -en seriously? It’s not like you use English verb conjugations for all the English verbs that are loaned into German. Norwegians for example speak even more English than the Germans and they use their own plural for such words “-er”.
Then there are these annoying compound words that could easily be translated into German but are not: Notebook(s)(computer) Why not Notizbuch(bücher) and Cupcake(s) why not Tassekuchen or something like that. It just seem like common sense. I’m not bashing German either, I myself am of German blood and it pains me to see this happen to the language of my Father and ancestors.
October 31st, 2010 at 6:33 pm
the germans have their language”abgef[rea]kt”
deutschermichel should know!
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November 27th, 2010 at 1:57 am
Okay, I’m a native German speaker (although I live in the Netherlands now) and I don’t make any of those mistakes you listed here. EVER. Further, I honestly do believe my English is good and I am certain this is not just me deceiving myself. Here’s a thought, how about you stop to overgeneralise?
Or, if we’re just bashing other nation’s language skills, here’s some pointers to America. What’s so difficult about keeping they’re and their apart, or then and than? Also, go with British spelling, ‘American’ is not a language.
December 2nd, 2010 at 6:49 pm
This is so typically German (the comment above). I love ALL postings although I’m German. My English isn’t perfect by any means, but I neither have an British accent nor make any of those mistakes listed above. But still… It’s soooo funny to read! Why are you (above) sooo German about it? This is ridiculous!!! I know too many Germans who’ve been living in the States for years and are still making those stupid mistakes! And the best thing: No American would ever laugh at you for it!!
Love the book, the page and the humour…and it always is great to send a link to one of those great postings to my American friends!! Keep up the good work!
December 3rd, 2010 at 6:18 pm
Kristine, of course John is overgeneralising! He’s taking the mickey out of everyone here, be it Germans or Americans. Just to give you a hint: This blog is irreverent and just “for the lulz”, as the young people would now say.
Your English is very good indeed as far as I can judge, and the same has been said about mine, even though I’m German too, so you can lighten up! We all know here that there are Germans whose English is excellent, but John has a point: A lot of people overrate their English skills, believing English to be an easy language.
December 3rd, 2010 at 6:21 pm
Especially Germans, of course, because they see the obvious similarity to their own language and therefore are much more prone to the fallacy of believing that in English, when in doubt, things work exactly like in their native language.
January 17th, 2011 at 3:32 pm
[…] Una risorsa correlata è Invented English Words, esempi di pseudo-inglese in tedesco, ovvero falsi anglicismi come handy (il telefonino), a cui aggiungerei public viewing e altri esempi descritti in Germans think they speak better English than they do. […]
February 22nd, 2011 at 6:48 pm
Your writing is offiensive. Only a racist would insult African Amercans by defining “shooting” as that which “happens on Martin Luther King Jr. Boulevard once a day;” You are very cozy with the stereotype that all African Americans are violence prone.
I agree, Marjorie. I am African American and I am not involved in any sort of violent activities at all, nor are my family or friends. Why say something like this?
Anyway, I have a German friend and he makes some mistakes (like saying “funny” instead of “happy”) but it doesn’t bother me. I think it’s kind of cute.
June 11th, 2011 at 1:01 am
My favorite from the world of web development: I often used to see job ads seeking “Flashers (m/w)” on the trade websites. These are, selbstverstandlich, people who can create animations with Adobe (Macromedia) Flash.
I don’t see it nearly as much nowadays, but still occasionally …