Archive for May 2nd, 2008

66% of Germans look goofy when they try to throw a ball.

Friday, May 2nd, 2008

There are two sports where Germany always has and always will dominate Americans in: Soccer and Auto Racing.

Never bet that the US will beat the Germans in Soccer, as this will end up costing you $200 before you finally learn your lesson, no matter how many goals Landon Donovan is currently scoring for the L.A. Galaxy.

Also, Americans will never drive as a well as Germans. Our idea of racing is putting everyone on a big oval and telling them to turn left. Germans have Michael Schumacher. Enough said.

But there is one thing two thirds of Germans cannot do, and that is throw a ball without looking totally goofy. Our estimation is that the remaining 33% are either handball players, are naturally athletic, or they got stuck in small town America during their year as an exchange student in high school , and had to learn to play football to pass the time.

Breakdown of throwing ability

98% of Americans can throw a ball without looking goofy, because of our education system, which without exception includes the game of dodge-ball, making the ability to throw a ball a necessary survival skill.

Dodge Ball

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