The surprising thing about culture shock is that it is actually worse when you get back to your home country. When you move off to a foreign land, you expect that you are going to have to adapt to changes. But when you set foot back on your own shores, suddenly you realize that home is missing some of the things you have come to love.
100% of Americans returning home from Germany miss German bread and German chocolate, immediately. Although feeble attempts to recreate German bread are created throughout the country, you can still always mash the entire loaf into a pancake shape with ease. Pretty good bread is available in America, but certainly not on every street corner.
The chance to walk around a nice looking city center, without being inundated with cars and ugly billboards competing for your short attention span, is something most Americans returning home miss as well. Most of us would like to have the chance to walk or bike somewhere without imminent death waiting around each street corner.
Germany produces some of the worst software ever created, i.e. SAP. One need only compare the beautifully elegant Gmail to the hideous GMX, which the majority of Germans inexplicably continue to use. Despite Germany’s propensity towards poor quality software, Germany makes the best computer magazine in the world, c’t, which expat computer geeks severely miss upon their repatriation.
In America we speak our own flavor of English, which is missing the amazingly useful word doch. Normally German words are entire sentences strung together into a single word, but this little gem is actually the sentence, “I am right, and you are wrong”, all wrapped up into a single grunt from the bottom of your throat. The closest we have as Americans to this is “yuh-huh”, but that becomes unacceptable to say after you turn 7 years old, about the age where you are expected to stop saying exactly how you feel.
deutsche Übersetzung für Astrid
Astrid, schön dass Du wieder da bist,
hier die Übersetzung:
Kulturschock
Das Überraschende an einem Kulturschock ist, dass er schlimmer ist, wenn Sie zurück in Ihr Heimatland gehen. Wenn Sie in ein fremdes Land ziehen, erwarten Sie bereits, dass Sie sich an Veränderungen gewöhnen müssen. Aber wenn Sie sich wieder auf den Weg in Ihre eigene Umgebung machen, werden Sie feststellen, dass es dort einige Dinge nicht gibt, die Sie zu lieben gelernt haben.
100% der Amerikaner, die aus Deutschland zurückkehren, vermissen sofort das deutsche Brot und die deutsche Schokolade. Auch wenn im ganzen Land klägliche Versuche gestartet werden, deutsches Brot nachzumachen, können Sie immer noch problemlos den ganzen Laib Brot mit einem einzigen Schlag in Pfannkuchenform bringen. Es gibt ziemlich gutes Brot in Amerika, aber definitiv nicht an jeder Straßenecke.
Die Chance, in einem hübschen Stadtzentrum herumzulaufen, ohne von Autos und hässlichen Werbetafeln überschwemmt zu werden, die um Ihre kurze Aufmerksamkeitsspanne konkurrieren, ist auch etwas, das die meisten heimgekehrten Amerikaner vermissen. Die meisten von uns würden die Chance mögen, mit dem Fahrrad oder zu Fuß unterwegs zu sein, ohne dass der drohende Tod hinter jeder Straßenecke lauert.
Deutschland produziert die schlechteste Software, die jemals hergestellt wurde, zum Beispiel SAP. Man muss nur das wundervoll elegante Gmail mit dem scheußlichen GMX vergleichen, das die Mehrheit der Deutschen unerklärlicherweise immer noch benutzt. Entgegen ihrem Hang zu Software von schlechter Qualität machen die Deutschen das beste Computermagazin der Welt, die c´t, das Computerfreaks stark vermissen sobald sie zurück nach Amerika kommen.
In Amerika sprechen wir unsere eigene Variante von Englisch, die das unheimlich nützliche Wort „doch“ vermissen lässt. Normalerweise bestehen deutsche Wörter aus ganzen Sätzen, die zu einem Wort zusammengefasst werden, aber dieser kleine Juwel beinhaltet den ganzen Satz „Ich habe Recht und Du hast Unrecht“, zusammengefasst zu einem einzigen Grunzen, das aus der Tiefe der Kehle kommt. Das amerikanische Wort, das dem „doch“ am nächsten kommt, ist „yuh-huh“, aber das ist nicht mehr akzeptabel, sobald man 7 Jahre alt wird, ungefähr das Alter, in dem Sie aufhören sollten zu sagen, was Sie denken.
Liebe Grüße,
John
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May 28th, 2008 at 3:50 pm
“Normally German words are entire sentences strung together into a single word, but this little gem…” - I think there is missing a “not” round there.
btw: What’s “Klugscheißer” in english?
May 28th, 2008 at 4:35 pm
Lt. dict.leo.org kommen dafür anscheinend mehrere Wörter in Frage.
know-it-all
smartass
wisenheimer
whippersnapper
smart aleck
Welches davon jetzt genau den Kern der sache trifft, kann dir nur ein mother tongue’ler sagen.
May 28th, 2008 at 4:38 pm
“In America we speak our own flavor of English, which is missing the amazingly useful word doch.”
Feel free to use it whenever you like, maybe “doch” becomes the new “uber”. Btw, does anyone know where this comes from, i mena “over” would have done the job. Same goes for “Gesundheit”, there is an english phrase for that, but somehow the german term is the common one.
May 28th, 2008 at 4:42 pm
I can’t find the entry where you talk about Germans opening beer bottles with their teeth. Have a look here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MYhudJ3tUQk
What say you now?
May 28th, 2008 at 4:56 pm
That is what I call SERVICE — you check your server logs, identify your audience, and verbalize what they are thinking but cannot say for fear of being terminated. Great job.
May 28th, 2008 at 7:57 pm
In America we speak our own flavor of English, which is missing the amazingly useful word doch. Normally German words are entire sentences strung together into a single word, but this little gem is actually the sentence, “I am right, and you are wrong”, all wrapped up into a single grunt from the bottom of your throat.
Ha, so true! It does slip out of my mouth every now and then, and it’s funny to watch peoples reaction. They don’t know wether to say Gesundheit, do a Heimlich Maneuver or just look at me with a blank stare.
May 28th, 2008 at 11:01 pm
I think of “trotzdem” as powerfull as “doch”.
GXM really is crap.
May 29th, 2008 at 12:01 am
This reminds me of this TV ad for MCDonalds (an American Company) where Heidi Klum (one of the few contemporary Germans most Americans know) ends a discussion with a resolute “Doch!”
May 29th, 2008 at 8:48 am
Probably the biggest culture shock of returning to america is the schrecklich 10 days of vacation one must endure. Deshalb, I want to stay here for the rest of my leben.
May 29th, 2008 at 12:40 pm
“The closest we have as Americans to this is “yuh-huh”, but that becomes unacceptable to say after you turn 7 years old, about the age where you are expected to stop saying exactly how you feel.”
Good thing then, that we germans never learn either lesson in our childhoods…
doch is the new uber!
^^
May 29th, 2008 at 3:37 pm
Since “earworm” made it into English recently, let’s go with “doch”. But I think it will be something like “dock” because there is no “ch”…
May 29th, 2008 at 5:28 pm
@ Jörn & Martin:
know-it-all (OK)
smartass (most commonly used)
wisenheimer (a bit old fashioned but OK)
whippersnapper (also OK but used in reference to a child/kid)
smart aleck (also OK)
May 30th, 2008 at 7:55 am
@Dent
I think, “über” came to the US like “computer” came to us Germans nowadays (instead of i.e. the German “Rechenmaschine”): the lingua franca of the information technologies is English and “computer” is just the common technical term in that language.
“Über” is, at least, a technical term too, as used in “Übermensch” (Nietzsche - philosphy) or “Über-Ich” (Freud - psychology). And because Germany was “the country of poets and thinkers” (”Land der Dichter und Denker”), in the humanities German was the lingua franca.
Even in foreign countries students of the humanities were often teached in German language (the most important philosophers spoke German, the most important psychologists spoke German, the most important books on these branches of study were written in German, and so on) …
… until WW II.
May 30th, 2008 at 9:49 am
It also works the other way around - coming back from the US to Germany I missed the open shops on Sunday, customer service (normally non-existent here), free re-fills in McD or BK, free water jugs in every restaurant … I could keep going.
Germany produces some of the worst software ever created, i.e. SAP.
*cough*paysmybills*cough* But the worst about the software is not the software itself, it’s the GUI. Makes my eyes tear up every time I look at it.
Well, I am a Mac user. I am spoiled when it comes to design
May 30th, 2008 at 11:21 am
The main reason we continue to use awkward email services like GMX is that we trust them to more or less abide to German data privacy standards. We like Google, but we don’t trust them.
May 31st, 2008 at 7:48 am
Another word I believe to be quite intranslatable is “selber”, as in ’Du bist doof!’ – ’Selber doof!’
May 31st, 2008 at 7:57 am
selber!
wohl!
doch!
ach, ich liebe es!
May 31st, 2008 at 8:34 am
@Dent:
Naja, die meisten Deutschen nehmen ihre Sprache als gegeben ohne drüber nachzudenken, wie es z.B. dieser Blogger tut
Aber “Super” ist nichts anderes als Latein für “Über”. Allerdings weniger als Ortsangabe wie das deutsche Wort “Über”, sondern.. z.B. Übervater oder so. Weil das durchaus auch für Muttersprachler verwirrend ist, wird anstelle von Über in diesem Kontext dann einfach das Fremdwort Super benutzt. Daher auch die meist falsche Übersetzung von Superman in Supermann. Eigentlich heißt Superman nichts als schlicht Übermensch und kann auch auf Frauen ohne blaue Lycra-Anzüge angewandt werden
Naja und da Amerikaner genauso wie Deutsche (zu meinem bedauern) gerne exzessiv Superlative benutzen, hat eben irgend einer mal entdeckt dass das auf Deutsch “Über” heißt und benutzt es entsprechend. Deutsche Wörter haben nun mal oft mehrere Bedeutungen die uns selbst gar nicht so bewusst sind. Denk nur mal an das Wort “Sie”.
Das kann die höfliche Anrede sein, man kann damit aber auch über eine 3. weibliche Person reden oder über eine Gruppe von Personen, durch Sie/sie kann man dies beim Text ja noch unterscheiden - aber beim sprechen?
Wörter die ich im Englischen vermisse sind eher solche wie “halt” (”Jetz komm halt her”) oder so. Diese ganzen Partikel. Oder ganz simple Dinge wie Wellenbad, die muss man dann immer umschreiben mit sowas wie public swimming pool with waves oder so.
June 3rd, 2008 at 6:21 pm
Who the hell uses GMX webmail? That’s what Thunderbird is for!
June 3rd, 2008 at 6:35 pm
Hey John, Love the site. I thought I recognized some of those discussions from a bar in Amsterdam… yuh-hun!
June 7th, 2008 at 12:24 pm
@come to speaking of SAP: it’s the same with SAP as it is with Windows: they were the first on their market with a good advertising.
@Starstuff: free refill @ BK: I only visit one Burger King - and here you’re allowed to refill once
@Ric: “halt” is Dialekt, kein Deutsch. Sag das mal nem Kölner oder Berliner, da schauen die dich recht blöd an (meine Erfahrung^^)
June 13th, 2008 at 7:35 am
@ Starstuff
I dunno, have you been in the US long enough to actually encounter the “real” customer service? I notice, the only “service” you’Re getting is in places where it does not matter, like getting bags packed in Wal Mart or stuff of equal value. But I have lost to parcels by UPS so far, both times with a very crappy customer handling afterwards, also the Time Warner Cable guys did not show up twice already without notice, when I finally get someone here they are unfriendly and cocky up to completely not willing to even talk to you about the actual problem etc. I’ve had a lot of encounters like that over basically all kinds of business, my conclusion so far: where it really matters in CS, when something goes wrong or maintenance is required, both which don’t get the company any direct profit, CS is usually varying from crappy to not there at all.
July 4th, 2008 at 2:20 am
@Joerg
halt ist kein Dialekt, nur Umgangssprache. Ich weiß nicht wie es in Berlin ist, aber hier in Köln ist es gebräuchlich
August 6th, 2008 at 8:29 pm
would like to add the word “fei” which is quite common in N. Bavaria as well.
Meaning something like “really, for real”, or “would you believe that”
Example: Wir sind fei gestern sehr spaet ins Bett gekommen
or: Ich hab dich fei sehr lieb.
August 29th, 2008 at 3:44 pm
Nicht gegen:
Software aus Pakistan/Polen,
Sanduhr-Anzeige-Programm,
Submit and Pray,
Scheiß aufs Privatleben!
Gibt leider nix besseres
October 25th, 2008 at 5:06 pm
By the way: Your website is recommended in the current c’t magazine:
Als Alien in Deutschland
Schon der in feinstem Lübke-Englisch formulierte Seitentitel “Nothing For Ungood” deutet dezent darauf hin, dass hier keinen Streicheinheiten zu finden sind. Der Amerikaner John ist mit einer Deutschen verheitratet, lebt bei Münster (”It is pretty awesome. Except for the weather”) und beschreibt süffisant, was alles ins Auge fällt. …
November 21st, 2008 at 8:07 pm
…and after all of the comments, not a single expat has said anything about the beer they most certainly miss upon returning to the States?
@john: please touch on the whole standing-in-line issue! I would, but quite honestly, I’m scared of the reaction.
November 23rd, 2008 at 1:51 pm
@ Mike: you’re so right.
My American friend David was very grateful about the two 0,5 l Weizenbier glasses I brought to him from Germany (half a litre is about an eigth of a gallon). He missed wheat beer since his return to the U.S. after spending two years in Germany.
We went to a liquor store in Brandywine (close to the Pennsylvania-Maryland border) the other day to shop for some wheat beer. We found Erdinger, which was only available in 0,33 l bottles (a twelfth of a gallon).
It was good enough for us two, as we put the content of three bottles in two glasses. But for him alone, it’s awkward - you will neither get imported 0,5 l bottles (even in specialized stores), nor will you find 0,33 l wheat beer glasses…
Greeetz, Thomas
November 23rd, 2008 at 7:50 pm
Brandywine? Isn’t that in the Shire??
November 23rd, 2008 at 10:00 pm
Yeah, but it’s just a Hobbit slang version of the Sindarin (Elvish) name fot the river “Baranduin”.
They just didn’t understand the original word and came up with something similar.
December 16th, 2008 at 3:44 pm
Just as a hint for all the homecoming Computer-Addicted Americans…
I am living (as a German) in Japan. And I get my c’t homedelivered! And the oncosts are really reasonable (ca. 11 Euro per year)! For me it is always a happy event when it arrives (try to watch the japanese TV and
you will understand — and it is not a language problem…)
Btw: It was exactly that magazine, which braught me to this page.
OG
June 19th, 2009 at 2:34 pm
Also many Germans use web.de, which is more horrible than GMX
December 28th, 2009 at 3:08 pm
“Germany produces some of the worst software ever created, i.e. SAP. ”
I told a friend of mine about that comment, and he just said that’s a bunch of baloney. SAP is one of the most reliable and effective software producer, as stated by him.
He happens to work there, though.
January 20th, 2010 at 3:53 pm
Couldn’t you just say “of course” if you want to say “doch”?
Perhaps you need more emphasis in your voice to sound more like doch..^^
(like “Of course I’m right!”)
January 26th, 2010 at 10:08 am
@ Jenny:
Nope Jenny - that’s not the meaning. In our English-speaking community we often use the word ‘doch’ as a response to a negative statement that we disagree with. For example:
“It’s not going to rain today”
“Doch” (”Oh, yes it is” or “Take a look at the black clouds behind us … “)
“She’s not put on an ounce since getting married”
“Doch” (”Oh, yes she has” or “My dear, are are you totally blind?”)
I vote that we officially introduce ‘doch’ into the English language. It’s incredibly useful and without an equivalent.
January 26th, 2010 at 5:19 pm
In America we also say, “Oh really” or just “really” in a disdainful way ending the syllable “ly” with a down inflection (or putting more emphasis on the first syllable). It is a way of saying that you don’t believe what was just said or that you do not approve.
For example:
“The Cubs are going to win the World Series.”
“Oh really” (There will be snowballs in Hell before that happens)
There was an entire segment on Saturday Night Live built around this saying, where statements made by public figures where refuted by starting out, “Oh really”.