Earlier we discussed the topic of reverse culture shock upon repatriating to America from Germany. Not only can the psychological effects be devastating, but physical dangers lurk around every corner, as well.
While living in Germany you will likely take up walking through the forest as way to escape the fast paced city life. Germany took care of the one major forest danger by shooting their bear Bruno, so now the worst that can happen to you is that you slip on one of these slimy slugs and break a hip.
After all these ventures into the peaceful forests, you may get a little too comfortable hiking around and enjoying the fresh air. Don’t forget that America is a dangerous place, as you can see in this sign:
There are vicious animals such as coyotes, mountain lions, bears, and squirrels. Don’t forget that these are ferocious beasts and always keep a safe distance, no matter how cute and friendly these critters may appear.
No matter how much these things look like they want to cuddle up with you, keep away, as they are wild killing machines.
And on the subject of squirrels, Germans will always try to make you say their word for squirrel. Don’t do it, they are just going to laugh at you.
deutsche Übersetzung für Astrid ein/ausblenden
Tag Astrid,
hier die Übersetzung
Die Gefahren der Rückwanderung
Wir haben bereits in einem früheren Artikel über das Thema des entgegengesetzten Kulturschocks bei der Rückkehr nach Amerika von Deutschland gesprochen. Nicht nur die psychologischen Auswirkungen können vernichtend sein, auch physische Gefahren lauern hinter jeder Ecke.
Während Sie in Deutschland leben, werden Sie wahrscheinlich Waldspaziergänge als einen Weg entdecken, dem schnellen Stadtleben zu entfliehen. Deutschland hat die eine große Gefahr des Waldes entfernt, indem sie ihren Bär “Bruno” erschossen haben, also ist nun das Schlimmste, was Ihnen passieren kann, dass Sie auf einer der schleimigen Nacktschnecken ausrutschen und sich die Hüfte brechen.
Siehe Abbildung 1!
Nach all diesen Ausflügen in den friedlichen Wald werden Sie vielleicht ein wenig zu bequem beim Herumwandern und Frischluft geniessen. Vergessen Sie nicht, dass Amerika ein gefährlicher Ort ist, wie Sie auf diesem Schild sehen können:
Siehe Abbildung 2!
Da gibt es solch böse Tiere wie Kojoten, Berglöwen, Bären und Eichhörnchen. Vergessen Sie nicht, dass dies wilde Biester sind und halten Sie immer einen Sicherheitsabstand, egal wie süß und freundlich diese Viecher erscheinen mögen.
Siehe Abbildung 3+4+5!
Egal wie sehr diese Dinger danach aussehen, als wollten sie mit Ihnen kuscheln, bleiben Sie auf Abstand, da sie wilde Werkzeuge des Todes sind.
Und beim Thema Eichhörnchen werden die Deutschen immer versuchen, Sie zum Aussprechen dieses Wortes zu bringen. Tun Sie das nicht, sie werden Sie nur auslachen.
Kuschelige Grüße,
John
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June 11th, 2008 at 5:29 am
NEVER underestimate squirrels! If we lerned something from The Legend of Kyrandia - Book Three - Malcolms Revenge it should be that kyrandian killer-squirrels are extremely dangerous (even similar to mimes).
June 11th, 2008 at 5:58 am
Holy crap! I’ll write to Mr. Schäuble that we’ll need to install observation cameras in the german forests, just in case any of these killer squirrels appear and plan terroristic acts on our country. The Axis Of FurrEvil is not to be underestimated. Their numbers are countless, so it’s fair to call them squirrels, rabbits & sympathisers pure weapons of mass-destruction. Maybe they gonna build “the bomb” - who knows? Maybe the suicide squirrels are already marching on the Bundeskanzleramt…
June 11th, 2008 at 6:23 am
Your last piece of advice came too late. I lost count of people here in Germany poking fun of me trying to pronounce “Eichhörnchen”. But that of course was long long ago, and just last week I was able to boast my (painfully learned) perfect pronunciation when I saw lots of Eichhörnchen in a park.
In fact, in matters of squirrels I can say I’m very proficient, because “squirrel” can’t possibly be taken as a particularly easy word for a native speaker of Brazilian Portuguese.
Why don’t Germans and Americans have a better and much simpler word for Eichhörnchen and squirrel like the Brazilian equivalent “esquilo” [esk’ilo]?
June 11th, 2008 at 6:50 am
Since squirrels are a sylvatic population for rabies, I think that I treat them with greater care than you do… and don’t they carry the Black Plague on the West Coast?
June 11th, 2008 at 7:02 am
Just a short note: Germany has been declared rabies-free with the beginning of Mai 2008, two years since the last case in either wild or domestic animals was detected.
June 11th, 2008 at 8:33 am
Hi
Eichhörnchen is ways easier to pronounce than the bavarian word for “squirrel tail” Oachkatzlschwoaf
Has anybody asked you to pronounce: Streichholzschächtelchen (matchbox)?
Wendy
June 11th, 2008 at 8:50 am
Ich möchte in unserern Wäldern aber keinem wütenden Keiler begegnen, oder ner Bache mit Jungen. Dann lieber Killer”Eichhörnchen”
June 11th, 2008 at 9:15 am
[…] Kann das Wort fuer die Tiere ausserdem nicht aussprechen: Germans will always try to make you say their word for squirrel. Don’t do it, they are just going … […]
June 11th, 2008 at 11:01 am
Hey, hey - let’s not forget about the vicious, insatiable European Marder! Okay, not so much against humans, but think about all those poor, innocent, unsuspecting autos out there!
And yes, anything with the word “Hörnchen” is a horrible word for us non-native speakers, especially those untrained like myself. Going to a bakery to get a croissant was never so entertaining for the cashier.
June 11th, 2008 at 2:22 pm
Just say what a normal German would say: Ain krossong bitte!
June 12th, 2008 at 12:03 am
You forgot to mention the ferocious snapping turtles which may be seen in or near creeks
June 12th, 2008 at 12:17 am
John, do us all a favor and rise the entertainment factor of this blog by 200%. At least for us germans.
Please record yourself saying “oachkatzlschwoaf” and put that online.
June 12th, 2008 at 3:49 am
OK, as soon as I am back from vacation on Friday, I will say “Eichhörchenschwanz” and post it here, so that everyone can laugh at me.
June 12th, 2008 at 4:33 am
As a German teacher in the US, I agree:
The only thing cuter than a squirrel is an American trying to pronounce the German word for squirrel. :o)
June 12th, 2008 at 7:55 am
We should be glad that we don’t live in Siberia:
Russian squirrel pack ‘kills dog’
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/4489792.stm
June 12th, 2008 at 8:32 am
don’t underestimate the ferocity of the common grey squirrel! They might appear cute, but they are some sort of secret ninja cult in cuter outfits. At my first visit to London I was amazed how friendly they seemed coming up to me in regents park, but soon I would find out they were only on a raid for food, attacking me in huge numbers. I preferred to withdraw.
June 13th, 2008 at 5:27 pm
Those US squirrels are rather dull-coloured, whereas our German squirrels’ fur is FLAMING RED!!
June 21st, 2008 at 12:01 am
hm, reminds me of this horrifying article…
The 6 Cutest Animals That Can Still Destroy You
http://www.cracked.com/article_15853_6-cutest-animals-that-can-still-destroy-you.html
Editor’s Note: The link contains naughty words but is really informative and funny.
June 23rd, 2008 at 9:17 pm
The next time a German makes you say “Eichhörnchen” turn the tables on them and make them say “squirrel”. It’s almost as impossible for them as Eichhörnchen is for you!
June 24th, 2008 at 6:53 pm
Squirrels have bloodlust in Germany as well!
http://www.dw-world.de/dw/article/0,2144,2609118,00.html
Just a sample:
A squirrel with aggression issues acted out in the southern German town of Passau, injuring three people before his last victim finished him off with a crutch.
The Bavarian town of Passau, on the Austrian border, is usually a fairly quiet place, with man and nature living in relative harmony. But this week, the bucolic balance was thrown off when a squirrel went berserk, terrorizing three in a biting rampage that ended only with his death.
His first victim was a 70-year-old woman, who was sitting peacefully in her living room when she was surprised by the sensation of small claws on her back. The squirrel had jumped through a window and onto the woman, soon sinking its teeth into her hand. Acorns weren’t on this little guy’s mind, arteries apparently were.
GAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
September 21st, 2009 at 4:06 am
Jah jah, ze squeirol iz ze kryptonite to ze Deutsch tongue!
A good deal many of Germans seem to have convinced themselves that Eichhörnchen is in some way difficult to pronounce.
I fear this all harks back to the perverse Teutonic pride and lack of humour: because it’s so insanely funny hearing a German attempt to pronounce squirrel, your average German becomes unduly offended, and attempts to compensate for this by going on the offensive. Pretending that eichhörnchen is in some way impossible for an English-speaker to pronounce tempers the offended German’s pride and gives them an empty laugh.
October 11th, 2009 at 3:35 pm
To defend my fellow countrymen about the Eichoernchen thing, I’m in Russia with a bunch of other exchange students right now, and the Americans made me and a lot of other people say “squirrel” because Russian can’t pronounce it for their lives.
They were pretty disappointed to see that I can say it without dificulties