Germans being bad listeners I think is just one expression of the pragmatic differences between German and English – at the symptomatic level. You could go a bit deeper and think about why Germans come across to English speakers as bad listeners, and maybe also reflect on the fact that it’s mutual: English speakers often come across a bit strange to German speakers. There are linguistically well-documented reasons for this.

Hier haben wir es mit einem typischen Amerikaner zu tun, der meint, dass nur amerikanisches Englisch Gültigkeit hat und nichts von außeramerikansichen Alternativen weiß. “turnover” ist nämlich gang und gäbe” in Großbritannien. “revenue” i. S. v. “Umsatz” wird in UK erst in den letzten Jahren benutzt (lässt sich sowieso im Zug der Globalisierung nicht vermeiden).

The post here about a subject that is undoubtedly intended to be humorous illustrate the cultural differences that I can’t escape. The Germans tend to react to things like this by putting the American way of (insert topic here) down. Most Germans believe themselves to be better educated (They are not. See PISA, TIMSS, Igloo . No statistical difference in any year of study.) Most Americans who post on these kinds of blogs get their national pride in the way of admitting that sometimes the American way of (insert topic here) isn’t the best way (obvious to anyone who has traveled a bit).

Ian, the token Canadian, is always good for knee-jerk anti-Americanism without much real thought even when true criticism is due. I’m always loved in Canada as a German but once they know I also have an American passport the silly polemic comes out.

Oooh, I DID get it! “Nag, nag!” sounds a bit like “Quack, quack!” Only more nasal, which comes quite close to the duck’s actual noise!

About the animal dialects, I actually found something here:

http://books.google.com/books?id=FZ0K9z2PRDwC&pg=PA235&lpg=PA235&dq=animal+dialects&source=bl&ots=y_40G29HNV&sig=DlkpnMtTpAxrvkRNYdGJFwwhrC4&hl=de&ei=BxzBS-2nFsGIOLy6zZcE&sa=X&oi=book_result&ct=result&resnum=4&ved=0CBgQ6AEwAw

I remember reading something about regional dialects of (say) dog barking even resembling the cadence of the people living there!

Also John: The joke is awesome! Although if you don’t recognise the names of any baseball player (as Europeans are wont to do - honestly, I happen to have heard about Babe Ruth and Joe DiMaggio, but not many more players really), you won’t quite get the punchline.

The other jokes I liked too.

I’ve heard both frogs going “ribbit” and frogs going “quak”. I’m sure they are different species.

The different ways to imitate the sounds of animals is understandable from culture to culture. I bet the animals themselves would laugh if they knew what we do to try to sound like them.
I am a big friend of Germans and German culture, but I have to say that there’s one thing where the Germans really have it wrong: Everyone knows that the Sun is male and the Moon is female. “He” shines by day, and “she” illuminates the romantic nights. I just can’t bring myself to speak of the Moon as a male entity when I speak German. And that is only the beginning: Male men used to be male boys, but female women used to be NEUTRAL girls; In German, a girl is not a she but an IT.
I suspect the Germans do this just to keep the language difficult and laugh at us when we still can’t speak correctly after 20 years of learning.